That’s the directive I have been given, anyway. Ran across one small foxpaw. Oops.
Your friend,
Fisher
Dear Friends,
I received another letter from Mary, the cat who would be queen. She is reunited with her people and living well. Her beans cleaned up their act, looked around and realized they missed their beloved Mary.
All is now well in her kingdom, and also in the household of the two cats who were unprepared to serve her.
Don’t you just love happy endings?
Your friend,
Fisher
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Your friend,
Fisher
From my friends at cutebreak.com
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Do I look innocent?
Dear Fisher, Me? Oh, I don't think so!
I am not a cat. I am a human with 2 cats that are giving me a huge problem. They refused to write and made me promise not to mention any names. I have to take matters into my own hands and ask you for advice. One cat is male, the other female. Both have been “fixed” and have never been outside. One of the cats is now going potty on area rugs and has even peed on the couch. We are not sure which one it is because they are ninja cats. Their cat box is cleaned regularly. We’ve never had a problem with them since we’ve had them – close to 4 years now. Why would they do this, and how do i stop them? I’m at my wits end!!! I don’t want to get rid of them or make them outdoor cats but I can’t let them ruin my home either. PLEASE HELP!!!
Robert
Dear Robert,
First of all, I cannot ignore the gravity of the problem when a human has to write to me instead of the pets. Oh dear! Your comment that the cats are Ninja cats leads me to believe it is a case of “it was dry and now it is wet and there is absolutely no chance of catching them in the act.” They are a mischievous pair indeed. Without losing any more time, I have to suggest you take them to their vet for a check-up. Hopefully they will get a clean bill of health and maybe this will make them realize that you are not kidding.
Best case scenario is the cats are healthy. Back to square one, but it is a good thing. We can look at a few different methods of handling the problem:
- Determine what time of day the deed happens most and separate the cats, putting each in a comfortable area but closed off and give each the opportunity to mess up.
- Try covering the area (after it is cleaned and dried) with aluminum foil to stop this new bad habit. Cats really do not like the feel of the foil.
- Carefully determine whether or not you have made changes that the cats are objecting to and modify the situation. Cats do not like change.
- Purchase some puppy training pads and place in appropriate areas.
- Even though you have had the cats for several years, a refresher course on litter box practices will not hurt.
Visit Dumb Friends League for their detailed report.
Above all, please do not turn the cats outside. Dangers can exist in the most pleasant of neighborhoods and it would be a sad thing if they were hurt or lost. If you even think about going to that extreme, try another extreme and hire a pet psychic. They understand ninja kitties.
Your friend,
Fisher
Comfort food?
Dear Fisher,
I am facing a fact. I have an obsession for stuffing my mouth with toys, socks, and sometimes underwear I find around the house. We have a cat here, too, and she gets really mad when I take her toys and pull them apart. My humans aren’t too happy with all the half pair of socks, either. Lately they are trying to teach me to leave their stuff alone and I have to start behaving. I just forget and go back to my old ways. Can you explain this and give us some advice so we are not all upset all the time?
Nick
Dear Nick,
You are describing what I call quirky dog behavior. While it may cause a lot of angst around your house, it is not at all uncommon. You, the dog, are quite trainable, and you will do well by your people to keep working at it. Humans are not always as easily trainable as their dogs, but they play a key role in the outcome of the whole exercise. A perfect combination is a dog who does not lose site of his need to please, and a human who will remain calm and consistent in their training procedures.
Understanding why you need to fill your mouth with stuff is an important start.
For instance, you may become bored when you are left alone. The war begins when the enemy is underwear and socks, and you must pursue the enemy in order to save the household from hidden danger. Or, if you are less creative, you simply want to get as much of your human’s scent as possible embedded in your psyche as possible, and what could be better than a stinky sock?
According to the Humane Society of the United States, “toys are not a luxury, but a necessity. Toys often help prevent bad behaviors from developing.” Your humans can alleviate their distress by establishing some habits of their own, such as:
- Pick up the dirty laundry and put it out of your reach
- Schedule some serious playtime with you before they leave the house
- I recommend looking at the Humane Society for tip sheets for solving poor dog behavior. My favorite is: Provide toys that offer variety—at least one toy to carry, one to “kill,” one to roll, and one to “baby.”
You may even inspire the cat to come up with a similar plan for her toys – or not. In any case, I wish you all well.
Your friend,
Fisher
