Dear Fisher,
Our house is crazy these days. The kids are all hyper and they put on awful faces and try to scare me. It works just fine, thank you very much. This is holiday season, and it’s just getting started. I can’t wait until it’s over! Worst is they have pictures of black cats in the windows and they all look scary as heck. It’s an insult and gives black cats a bad name. I just want to run away from home. Can you help?
Oscar

Dear Oscar,

If you mean will I help you run away from home, the answer is “No!” But if you mean will I help you try to deal with your situation, I will be happy to. First order of business is to get the kids you live with under control. Children can become overly exuberant when suddenly allowed to act like little monsters. You may remember doing much the same when you were a kitten.

You will do well to put forth your best effort to act aloof. After all, that is one of our best traits. The children put on scary masks and rush at you. You act aloof. The little monsters will get bored with their antics. They then start to pick on each other, which annoys the parents and they end up in time out. At that point, skip the aloofness and do a little happy dance.

As for the actual night of Halloween, your adult family members should help you by:
• Setting up a safe haven, with litter box, food and water dishes.
• Select a pleasant program on TV so the endless doorbell ringing will not drive you nuts.
• Close the door to your haven. Appoint one person only to check on you.
• Treats are OK, but no candy. Candy will cause new and often worse problems.

Everyone must be on guard for your safety. Urban legend or not, cats should not go out on All Hallows Eve. Many animal rescue groups even report an increase in requests for black cats at this time, and will refuse to adopt them out. For more information, check out the excellent article over at Daily to Reader.

You are right to say this is the first of the holiday season, and no doubt the worst of it will be over soon. Next is Thanksgiving. Please remember to think kindly upon all turkeys.

Your friend,
Fisher

a house of her own

My name is Cory and I have this frequent impulse to scratch the furniture at the house I live in. My human gets pretty mad at me. She even went so far as to get me my own little house, complete with scratching carpet. Well, that didn’t really work, but I included the picture anyway, ’cause it’s pretty cute..

I still go around the house, but mostly during the night, and visit my old scratching places in “her” house. She is pretty mad at me. Help!

Cory

Dear Cory,

First of all, your human made a conscious decision not to do away with your claws because she feels it is an abhorrent procedure and did not want to put you through that. At the same time, she is probably well aware of the scratching-the-furniture needs cats seem to have. Hence your own little house! I would say that is double lucky. However, things may look different to her now that you have exercised cat ignoring to the nth degree.

Cats scratch for various reasons. Glands between your toes give off a secretion with a distinctive odor to you. You just signed your name to that sofa. Cats are at home just about anywhere once they cordon off their own happy places. It really is a natural response to furniture in the house.

Sometimes, cat scratching is just a way to get rid of your old molting claws. This is a grooming decision you might have made for yourself. Your human might want to get out the nail clippers. You will be wise to accommodate her. Think of it as bonding time.
On the really upside of all this, you may be the proud owner of a new spectacular scratching station made just for you. Check this out at How to Do Things. Talk about a happy place and you could put it right next to your own special house – call it the patio furniture if you like!

By your very nature, you are going to get into a scratching frenzy somewhere – you might as well choose to use the help your human offers. As for punishment, there really is no humane way to punish a cat. They are just being cats and rarely understand what all the fuss is about.

Your friend,
Fisher

Dear Fisher,
I am a 9 year old, 15 lb part main coon and I’ve been with my parents since I was 1. I’ve always preferred to live inside and we’ve never had a big home and we’ve always shared a bathroom. When I was 2 or 3, I started to poop on the floor right in front of my litter box, but just when it started to drive my folks crazy, I’d poop in the litter box again. I’ve never had a problem with the litter box when I pee, but I’m getting to the point where I’ll poop just outside the box 10 times for every one time I use the box.
My parents clean out the box every day and they’ve been consistent with the litter since I was a kitten. I can tell they are upset because now they’ve started putting a little bit of my food where I poop, trying to discourage me, but I’ve been stubborn and that doesn’t work. They’ve even tried to lock me in the bathroom with my food, but it didn’t work and my mom thought that was mean, so they let me out.
I know my mom loves me no matter what, but my dad is getting very impatient and keeps mentioning that maybe I should move, but my mom won’t let me go. I’m already in an extra-large litter box that fits me well and there isn’t room for 2 separate boxes, but when they tried it anyway, I just peed in both and pooped on the floor. I hope you can help me!
Nishy

Dear Nishy,
My, my. It is obvious your people love you dearly. Even your dad is just mustering up some alpha cat to let you know you need to behave. They have gone to great lengths to get you to poop inside the box again.
Your humans have covered the most common reasons for your behavior. A quick review:

1. the box is clean, large enough for you, and the litter is not new to you
2. litter box is located in the bathroom where it is fairly quiet, no appliances making sudden noises
3. you have some privacy

You did not give me information on whether or not you have had a complete check-up at the vet clinic. Perhaps this was on purpose. Anytime behavior is on the side of “oh, no, now I have to clean up after you again,” it is good to make sure there are no physical causes.
Some cats just do not like to poop and pee in the same place. It can be that simple. If you have a rug or carpet next to your litter box and that is the surface you prefer to poop on, your parents can get another box (smaller) and put a piece of carpet in it. The carpet will need changing daily, so find a good source of carpet scraps. As you are happily using this new arrangement, your parents can add a little litter over the top of the carpet. If the floor is smooth, they can supply you with an empty box with a small amount of litter at one end so you can practice covering up again. You may always require this special arrangement or you may one day just decide to practice behavior that will please your bathroom-mates.
The Humane Society offers some worthy tips and advice. Check out
solving litter box problems.
Even though your folks have tried every trick in the book, something may just spark a new solution.

You are not the only one, Nishy, but you are the only one your mom and dad have to deal with. Work with them, OK?

Your friend,
Fisher

Dear Fisher,

I have a small problem. I am a cat who likes to steal my mom’s shoes and bath mat. I will chew on them and then drag them to my food dish. Sometimes I will go months without stealing them and one day I just got to get that shoe or bath mat. When I do steal a shoe or bath mat my mother gets very mad at me. Help – what can I do to stop this?

Sid

Dear Sid.

You have quite a problem and I admit, one of the most interesting I have heard. I must disclose to my readers that we had a few more notes back and forth because my first thought was, how big are you? Then in a follow-up to that, I asked if your mother wears tiny shoes. To my surprise, you are a wee 4 to 6 pound cat, and no, your mother does not wear tiny shoes, and the bath mat is 12” by 32” with rubber backing! That, my friend is a fine example of what focus and intention can do for one small kitty.

People are often not aware that cats are very strong when they have a mission. The key here is determining the nature of your mission. Cats are by nature, hunter gatherers. Even when spayed, a cat may have fierce maternal instincts. Add to these the fact that cats really do know the value of their possessions. Yours are #1, your mother, represented by her shoes and bathmat. Your food dish, of course, is your #2 most treasured possession,.

If we look at each of the above, we can explore possible solutions:

1.Hunter/gatherer: Your mother could place little treats in odd places around the house, requiring much of your waking time to seek and destroy.
2.Maternal instinct: Shoes and bathmat could be replaced with small cuddly toys for nurturing.
3.Prized possessions: Move food dish into bathroom with shoes and bathmat – a shrine, if you will, saving your strength and her angst.

Two other possibilities are separation anxiety or boredom. Please visit Our Happy Cat Our Happy Cat to discover many great ideas for your entertainment.

In all my research, I found it is not uncommon for cats to haul around socks. Dirty socks are preferred. Some cats will choose all types of undergarments, and some have been known to clear out entire laundry baskets. This leads me to the conclusion that you, Sid, are definitely an over-achiever. Your mother may just want to appreciate that.

Your friend,
Fisher

I am an older cat and I nap a lot, but the other times I’m just plain bored. I live in a high rise and am safe from bugs and other living dangers. My life is good from most points of view, but what am I supposed to do when I wake up and my peeps are gone to work all day? I love it here but the scenery never changes and it’s quiet all day long. Boring, boring, boring. Do you think my peeps think it is all OK just because I sleep a lot? I think not! What should I do?

Darryl

Dear Darryl,

Boredom happens when day after day, everything stays the same. You may all be in a rut. Your humans get up, feed the cat, go to work. They get home, pet the cat, feed the cat, and they are done for the day. When they come home and you are sleeping (again), they think you are fine. Your humans likely do not realize you are bored. “After all”, they would say, “Whoever heard of a bored cat?” But we know it happens, do we not?

Your humans must understand that a bored cat may turn to his own devices for entertainment which can lead to a roll of toilet paper strewn about the living room on the same day they bring a guest into the home after work. Or, you might think of trying alternative snacks from the garbage pail and proudly leave the evidence for them to clean up. Sometimes boredom causes one to become obsessive. For instance, cats tend to be extremely clean. You may overdo cleaning your fine long hair, and the humans come home to “here a ball, there a ball, everywhere a hairball.” Soon, everyone is unhappy.

Your task is to get your humans involved with you. Several ideas for boredom relief are:

1. They could get you a companion cat or dog depending on your personality. However, it would be very sad if you mistook it for punishment.
2. Your humans must get into the habit of controlled playtime with you. They should build 15 minutes into their morning and evening schedule. If you want less time, just act sleepy and they will move on to their daily routines.
3. Boredom can easily be relieved if you have something to watch. There are “mewvies” made especially for cats, or they could install a nice aquarium full of fish for you to watch.
4. An ordinary cardboard box with holes cut in the sides and a few toys stashed in it could inspire your imagination and keep you busy well past next nap session.

You could all have happy bonding time if you make your own toys. Take a look at this site for a ton of neat toys any kid can make. Add to the fun by hiding them around the house. Hunting is a natural cat instinct.

These are just a few ideas I have come across. Oh, one more! Drop a couple of ping pong balls in the bathtub and have a game of feline racquetball. Now, wouldn’t that just be the cat’s meow.

Your friend,
Fisher

Dear Fisher,

Hi, my name is Zelda. It is great to finally write you. My human reads your column and sometimes brings it home to show me.

Anyway, I am having some trouble in my new home here, and I was wondering if you could help me. My human and I met through his X and when they split up, I stayed with him. Even though he gets up REAL early in the morning and wakes me up, and then to school and work, and back home late at night and I have to yell at him for attention – I love it here! And, his parents have 2 Pomeranian dogs who are fun to play with.

I share a room with my human, and have a special pillow on the bed. Everything would seem great to the outside observer, but there is a dark side. My human’s parents already had a cat. Her name is Kitty-Lynn and she is a stick in the mud. She never wants to play and it seems like every time I come outside of my room to roam around, she is always there. We always end up just in the middle of a stand-off, hissing at each other and just staring. There are times when I try to be nice, but it just doesn’t work. I was wondering what can be done so we can finally live in peace. Sure, I have my room and she has hers, and as long as we stay out of each other’s way we are fine. But I would like to be able to share the living room and family room with her. Is there anything that can be done so we can finally get past our petty differences?

Zelda

Dear Zelda,

It sounds very encouraging to me that Kitty-Lynn and you are not getting into anything worse than hissing and staring. The process of getting along can be slower than you would like but it is very possible. Kitty-Lynn is probably a little miffed at your unexpected arrival. If you can try to not take that personally, it will help you both. She had her territory all laid out and was happy as the only cat.

There are some very interesting things you can do to make things better. All household members will need to cooperate and I think you will all get some good fun out of the exercises in the long run. Think of them as “character building” games.

Since you have already developed a pattern of hissing and staring at each other when any boundaries are crossed, it is best to start over at the beginning. That means that you, Zelda, will be confined to your own room for a short period of time. You will keep your litter box and food dishes in there with you, and of course, you have your own pillow on the bed. If it makes you feel better, go ahead and sleep directly on the bed cover and just use the pillow for your head.

The next step is for your human to put your food dishes very near to the door of your room before he goes out for the day. His parents should put Kitty-Lynn’s dishes on the other side of the door. The door stays closed a while longer. But, you will both start to associate each other’s presence with something pleasurable, like eating your dinner. Kitty-Lynn will start to get used to your smells, and you will start to get used to hers.
Stay with me – this is getting fun. Next step is to put a brick on each side of the door so it can remain open a tiny bit, not enough for either of you to break on through to the other side. Lots of opportunity to peak at each other! Good old cat curiosity will take over and you will both probably forget the staring and hissing shortly.

And now the Grande Finale! You, Zelda, can come out of your room and into the main house. Yes, the whole house! Kitty-Lynn will stay in your room with your things for awhile. Oh, I know, there is going to be a whole lot of snooping and sniffing going on while you get accustomed to each other’s smells, but as long as you have hidden away your really personal documents, there should be no problem. As you get to know each other in this very subtle way, you will become ready to face each other with a different attitude. You may not end up snuggling together, but I foresee some playtime together. Or, you might end up just peacefully tolerating each other which is pretty good, and we all know cats are masters of tolerance!

I also want to mention that our Tampa Bay SPCA also has a FREE Behavior Helpline. Call 727-586-3591, then ask for or dial extension 133 and follow the prompts.

Your friend,

Fisher