Dear Fisher,

I’m trying so hard to be calm, but the excitement of the Holiday has really gotten me going, and going, and going. I am pretty sure it is starting to annoy my people, because now they do the Christmas wrapping behind closed doors. Boy, I wanna help!

Then last night, they were having a quiet moment and all snuggled on the couch looking so cute, and silly me jumped up on the coffee table and was going to jump into their laps, but on the way, my furry tail crossed over the top of the candle. Boy, nothing like smelly singed cat hair to interfere with a little romance. I really feel bad about it. What can I do to make it up to them?

Maggie

Dear Maggie,

I remember well how much fun it is for a kitten to get into the wrapping paper and then bounce around on 3 feet because the Scotch tape is stuck to the 4th foot. But, be very careful about some of the dangers of the Holiday hoopla at your house. You already know about the candle! I am just glad you were not hurt. Your people were not as mad as you might surmise, but rather they were worried for your safety and maybe felt a little embarrassed about having a lit candle around a “lit” kitten.

Kittens have a tendency to want to explore anything new, and the gift wrapping and ribbon can be too much to ignore. Your people are wise to put all the fixings out of your reach because you could get all caught up in the ribbons and bows, tape and stickers, and whatever else they are using. It would not take a very long length of ribbon going down your throat to cause a serious digestive problem. And, of course, everyone knows you would not cause trouble on purpose. It is just your youthful curiosity.

Our friends at the ASCPA have published a helpful list for you and your folks. Their advice includes: do not sample the lovely floral arrangements, boughs of holly and live mistletoe - they can make you very sick. Do not drink Christmas tree water – it is a breeding ground for bacteria. No chocolate! No people food hand-outs! There is more at their site ASPCA. If you are starting to feel like the world is against your having fun for the Holiday, just remember that everyone cares about you, and you are having a fine life without getting into these possible dangers.

Make sure your people see this: If you suspect that your animal companion has eaten a potentially toxic substance, call your veterinarian or the ASPCA Animal Poison Control Center’s emergency hotline at (888) 426-4435 for round-the-clock telephone assistance. A fee may apply.

I found a really fun account of “Wrapping Christmas Presents With a Cat in the House” at wrapping presents. I hope you get a chance to check it out. While you are reading it (and totally relating to it), I want you to realize it would not have been written if not for so many other joyful little kitties getting into the same mischief. You are the essence of a kitten, and that is a good thing.

Your friend,

Fisher

published in tbt* Tampa Bay

Dear Fisher,

As you can see I’m a big, muscular, handsome tom-cat! However I seem to be having difficulty in how to handle a Golden Retriever, Jack, who is now a habitant of my domain. I’ve tried swatting him and biting him on the nose but nothing seems to work. He takes great joy in chasing me and I am personally getting sick of it. The other “intruder” on my turf is a cocker spaniel, Bailey, and he knows enough to give me my space. Any ideas on how I can train this brute?

Louis

Dear Louis,

Of course you are irritated with the constant chasing. The thing you must think about is your mode of behavior in retaliation. If swatting and biting of the nose is not working, perhaps you should think up a new plan. For instance, can you say “aloof”? It seems to me that Bailey uses this tactic well and it is working for the two of you. The more detached and unapproachable you can make yourself – and I know many cats who master this automatically – the less interest Jack will have in you.

You and Jack are just displaying parts of your different personalities. Big dogs tend to need much exercise to use up their restless energy. Big cats tend to not exercise so much, but rather just take life easy. Neither of you must accept any blame for your circumstance, but Jack does not see his actions toward you as a problem. You see a problem, and therefore must consider how you can change your attitude to make the situation better for you.

Jack sounds like he is in high prey drive, and as you have found out, once set in motion, he is hard to stop. This is where your humans might need to come into the picture. It is very hard to stop the chase once is has begun, but if they can look for the signs leading up to it they can help put a stop to the madness before it starts. The littlest signs that Jack is going into high energy mode should indicate to them that he needs to step outside – without you! It would be a perfect time to toss a Frisbee or tennis ball at the back fence and let him run off some of the steam.

Be very sure that you are not operating out of fear. Also be very sure you are not tempting him with little quirks of your own. Your humans can again watch for these tell-tail signs and avert your behavior. Cats have a way of staring at the “enemy” with their ears back and their tail wrenching back and forth. This particular tail action has quite the opposite effect of dog tail wagging. It is a defense ready action. So, you have on the one hand, the energetic ready-to-romp dog, and on the other, the defensive, ready to rumble cat. Hmmmm. Get the picture?

If your humans can pick up on these gestures, they can scoop you up and coddle you and you will first of all feel safe. Maybe even a little smug which if fine, but do not be too quick to show it. The ideal situation is to put a halt to the chasing, swatting and biting before is gets out of hand and the two of you are off to the races and their commands will likely become nothing more than background noise.

For more information and interesting advice, check out this web site: dogplay.

Your friend,

Fisher

published in tbt* Tampa Bay

Dear Fisher,

Hi. My name is Zilla, and I am guessing I am a descendant of Godzilla. That’s what I think anyway. That must be how I got my name. I sleep in a cool coconut shell my folks bought at the pet store. My problem is that my people just freak me out sometimes. I know it’s because they love me and think I am really cute, but their schedules and mine are totally out of synch. From early morning to late afternoon, I am in my serious sleep mode and then I can become suddenly airborne. What the heck is that about? I let them alone when they are sleeping! And then I shed. It’s normal, but they think I must be sick. I don’t even want to discuss the possibility of pet insurance over this, but I do want them to know how I feel without offending them. Thank you for listening.

Zilla

Dear Zilla,

I cannot think of any critter who would react favorably to going from sound sleep to airborne in a matter of nanoseconds. It would freak out most of us. In your case the explanation is simple. It is a predatory action for an enemy to approach a Leopard Gecko from above. It is important for your people to try to approach you from the front and at the same level in order for you not to perceive them as a predator. The fact that you are happily sleeping just makes the situation more difficult.

It will be good if your humans learn to place their hand in your enclosure and just let you walk into it on your own. They can also speak softly to you and offer a treat with their other hand. This might be an ideal situation, but it can be done. It is, of course, important for them to realize that if the soft voice and the treat incentive are ignored, you are sleeping and they might want to try again when your natural rhythm dictates you to be awake and alert, which is usually during the early stages of the night. However, now that you are in captivity (and I mean that in a most positive vein), you may loose some of your normal nocturnal instincts. Sometimes the over eager willingness for them to care for you results in a slight bit of irritation on your part. Give it time and patience.
The fact that they bought you a special coconut shell to sleep in indicates you can count on living well in their home. For instance, your tendencies to portray some sort of prehistoric creature, although much smaller, are very endearing. As you lumber along, ever so slowly, with each leg taking a slow turn to propel you along your path, they see you as some sort of pre-historic mini-dinosaur, and are truly in awe of your uniqueness. Just imagine how proud they are to have you as a pet. You are conjuring up things from their own long lost ancestry that they may not even be aware of.

And then you go into your shedding mode. What is a person to do when their beloved pet is turning white all over. During this time you probably quit eating. Humans do not always understand the process is natural and it can be disturbing to them. As you all get to know and understand each other, this will go away. You may have to put up with some “oh no, what is wrong with Zilla?”, but in the long run, they will learn that is what you do. Just as you will learn that they think you are so cute when you are sleeping, they have to pick you up and hence, there you are, airborne again.

There is some very good information and tips for your people at Leopard Gecko. If you can, print it out and post it on the refrigerator door and then act very innocent. I won’t tell.

Your friend,

Fisher

published in tbt* Tampa Bay