Dear Fisher,

I am Bella and my house mate is named Dante. Dante is an 18 lb gigantic sweet retard. I am a 9lb aggressive Tortie. We have been good friends for five years, but then I had a serious bout of redirected aggression the week before Thanksgiving and our people are very upset. I turned a scary situation around on Dante and now I’m the one afraid of him. He loves me but if I do anything to act out at him again, he will happily finish it.

Our humans have separated us and are slowly reintroducing us to each other. All is going slow, but well, and they think we will be OK together before they leave for Valentine’s weekend, but I can tell they are still scared to death to leave us alone. We do have a cat sitter coming in but our people don’t want us to get hurt if we backslide while they are gone. What should we do?

Bella

Dear Bella,

I have to surmise that your little bout of redirected aggression was an outright catastrophe (no pun intended). Your people are going to great lengths to keep such a display from happening again and they obviously want Dante and you to resolve your issues as soon as possible. I cannot help but wonder if injuries affected egos only or if bloodshed was involved. Either way, you must now help your humans regain their confidence in you.

The one thing to know about redirected aggression is that there is an underlying cause. Sometimes it is the result of just being in the wrong place at the wrong time. The “scary situation” caused your adrenalin pump to turn on and you acted out. The concern is not so much what you did, but what caused you to do it. Paying attention to the original underlying source and working to change it, will help solve the problem.
Some suggestions for your people to prepare for Valentine’s weekend:

1. Desensitizing your fear of Dante by leaving the two of you alone in the house for varying periods of time. If the house is intact and there are no injuries, reward with treat or new toy.
2. Give individual attention to each in the presence of the other. Then give pets to both at the same time.
3. If cats are not “getting it”, put both in time out, possibly through mealtime. If cats rush to food bowls in unison without confrontation, problem is close to solved.
4. If confrontation takes precedence over late lunch, contact pet sitter and extend getaway weekend.

I highly recommend your people take a look at Pet Wave. And for you two, remember Valentine’s is a celebration of love and friendship. Go ahead. Give peace a chance.

Your friend,
Fisher

Dear Fisher,

I’m a lady, 13 years young, who doesn’t get out much. I find it very entertaining to bash my food bowl about. I do it when my people are home. But when they’re gone, I nudge the bowl to unlikely places – like under the bed, in the middle of under the bed. It’s hilarious to watch them search all over. Especially Ma. She acts all mad and laughs her butt off at the same time. I love that!

Another thing I do is bury the food. I kick it over and cover it, say, with an area rug. This is interesting, but more obvious. It does serve to make food readily available, though – all I have to do is go around and tidy up. The one time I dug up dirt from the potted plant to cover my dish, Ma got out the vacuum cleaner. Can’t stand the thing!

Why don’t humans understand that dogs have a well-developed sense of humor? I mean, everything isn’t instinct, is it?

Maddie

Dear Maddie,

What you are describing here is instinct with a good dose of humor, except for the part about the re-emergence of the vacuum. Evidently not horrific enough to curb your creative side by adding humor to your life and entertaining your humans just to the edge of frustration. May they keep their good sense of humor!

The instinct part is your need for attention which is quite common in most dogs. Instinct may also come into play as you “bury” your food for future ingestion. But, that is where it stops and your playfulness and humor take over. My what busy days you must have.

Many dogs suffer from separation anxiety which is not funny and must be dealt with. Symptoms are excessive barking, whining, or chewing up everything in the house. You do not do these things, so let us explore your sense of humor.

Humor has many different forms, for instance:
1.Slapstick – basic level, usually physical: Tripping over your dog dish to get a laugh.
2.High-level, involves thought: Next time you dig in the plant, hide the vacuum.
3.Psychological, involves startling: Hide in dark corner of hallway, jump out at Ma first thing in the morning.

You are engaging in all three: hiding the bowl under the bed, in the middle of under the bed, and making her scold and laugh at the same time. I think that covers it. You can find more information (and a few new ideas) by visiting Practical Pets, Do Dogs Have Humor? My vote? Of course they do.

Your friend,
Fisher

How are you helping your humans get ready for Christmas?

Photo by http://www.flickr.com/photos/atillavibes/

I love to get mail. Most exciting is when it comes to my post office in the form of a package. This time was not a surprise, though, as I was asked to review a new little book by Chronicle Books, released last month. The book? The Worst-Case Scenario Pocket Guide for cats!

We all know how curious cats can be. We also know cats are quite self-sufficient and have a lot of pride. In this instance, curiosity won.

Authors: David Borgenicht and Ben H. Winters, with illustrations by Brenda Brown

As soon as we opened the package, my first thought was, This really is a pocket guide – fine-tuned and pocket ready. That is when pride won over curiosity and I concluded the authors likely realized that we cats just do not do Worst-Case Scenarios, hence the small size.

In their introduction, the authors write of the new kitten who really is a fun and cuddly pet, but then…

They act as if they own us, or as if they are gracing us with their presence. And sometimes, they even become downright difficult, scratching new furniture, marking territory, coughing up hairballs….

What? This is not going well. Only after reading on did I realize they are writing about the WORST-case scenarios. I forgave them and continued.

First you will find instructions to get a cat out of a tree. Very interesting with a surprise solution. It is so remarkable I think my staff was considering chasing me up a tree just to try it. Curious, anyone?

Much of the book is about different scenarios that must get handled: getting rid of cat pee odors, catnip addiction, and dealing with a cat who is afraid of mice. OK, that is definitely a worst-case scenario! Take a preview look at How to Kitten Proof Your Home.

Many humans have their own ideas of how to handle these difficult situations, but at the moment of distress are they really going to think clearly? The book is a little gem for just such times.

With Brenda’s excellent illustrations and the author’s fine wit, the book is well laced with humor – somewhat dry humor, very similar to a cat’s humor. My favorite section is Things to Make Out of Hairballs. Just to give you an idea, sample suggestions are: make fake sideburns, make piano dampers.

Please visit Chronicle Books to find their neat giveaway for 2010. Chronicle Books also publishes The Worst-Case Scenario pocket guide for dogs.

As for me, I could go on and on but I think I am about to have my own worst-case scenario – the Nightmare Nap. That would be the dream about my staff trying to chase me up a tree so she can try their solution to get me out.

Your friend,
Fisher

Dear Fisher,

I have a shameful secret. I am a huffer, slang term for a person (or cat) who inhales chemicals to get high. Every time my owners clean the bathroom, I sit in there for as long as it takes for the smell to dissipate. I don’t try to ingest the chemicals, I just get high off the smell. My owners don’t feel safe using all-natural cleaners to disinfect the bathroom, and the smell would take forever to go away if they closed the bathroom door. My owners are worried about me getting brain damage. Since the Betty Ford Clinic doesn’t take cats, what can we do?

Shadow

Dear Shadow,

You have done a beautiful thing by coming forward with your addiction. It is my guess that you are not the only huffer out there. By addressing the situation, you are also helping others. You must still have quite a few faculties left, though, to write such a letter.

Many humans believe the more odorous and chemically packed a cleaning product is, the more it will kill the germs. However, there is a growing movement toward Green Living, which calls for the use of more natural products to get rid of household germs. Case in point, my friends at
The Green Home and Garden Blog listed 101 Uses for Vinegar. They submit that “White distilled vinegar is a very versatile product that can be used to cook & clean your home.” Your people can help you by trying some of the following:

1.Kill germs all around the bathroom with a spray of full-strength white distilled vinegar. Wipe clean with a damp cloth.
2.To clean the floor, mix a solution of 3 drops dish washing liquid to 1/3 part white distilled vinegar, 1/3 part alcohol, and 1/3 part water. Spray sparingly and mop for a fast clean-up.
3.Remove soap buildup from faucets by scrubbing with a solution of 1 part salt to 4 parts white distilled vinegar.
4.To kill germs, spray full-strength white distilled vinegar on doorknobs and then wipe them dry.
These are just a few suggestions for cleaning, germ-killing and deodorizing. For more technical information, your owners would do well to visit Care2 Green Living and search their information on vinegar. Very convincing stuff there.
I found nothing to indicate vinegar cleaning will kill brain cells. You may, however, find yourself with cravings for dill pickles and sauerkraut. But that is another subject for another time.

Your friend,
Fisher

The dog is not allowed in the house.
Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
The dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture
The dog can get on the old furniture only.
Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed.
Okay, the dog is allowed on the bed, but only by invitation.
The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers.
The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only.
The dog can sleep under the covers every night.
Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.

From “My Dog is the World’s Best Dog” by Suzy Becker.

From my friends at cutebreak.com

For more fun visit CuteBreak.