Dear Fisher,
I am having a little trouble over all the holidays coming up in the next few weeks. Every time the family starts to talk about guests coming and menus and gifts, they end up looking at me with that “but what do we do about Patches” look. I must confess I made quite a fool out of myself last year when guests were ushered into the dining room for Christmas dinner and there I was, hind foot up in the air, having a bath in the middle of what could have been an elegant dinner table.
I feel bad about making my humans worry about me and my bad behavior this year. It’s kinda like they are all thinking, “what if Patches does that, or this, or oh, no, I can’t even imagine IF!” I guess you can see my concern here. Can you help me figure out a way put my family at ease so they can enjoy their holiday entertaining? Thanks.
Patches
Dear Patches,
My, my, I got the picture. Not only could I see you as the holiday centerpiece, I could almost hear gasping as if I were in the crowd entering the dining room. I have to admit it took me awhile to remove that image and picture a beautifully decorated table with soft glowing candles, a huge arrangement of poinsettia flowers, a big turkey with stuffing and many other lovely dishes filled with yummy smelling food. You did not happen to do a little sampling, did you? Never mind. Don’t answer that.
My image of the table without you in the middle of it brought up several worse scenarios. You were a bad kitty, yes, but it could have been worse. Upon entering the dining room, guests could have witnessed you barfing up leaves and flowers from the poinsettia arrangement. According to toxicologists at the ASPCA, it is a myth that this plant is poisonous to cats, but, says APCC’s Dana B. Farbman, CVT, “In reality, ingestions typically produce only mild to moderate gastrointestinal tract irritation in pets, which may include drooling, vomiting and diarrhea.”
Or worse, there could have been a putrid smell of burning fur had you not paid proper attention to the candles and accidentally set yourself on fire. What if you sampled the turkey dressing which likely contains sage? Sage can do a number on your gastrointestinal system and, in more simple terms, cause a major tummy ache with the outcome of completely over-powering the food and scented candle smells and burnt fur odor. So you see, it could have been a lot worse!
Follow these suggestions to help your people feel assured you will not do a repeat of last year:
- Stay completely out of the dining room. When they are paying attention to you, walk toward the entryway, then proudly turn around and walk away.
- Stay completely out of the kitchen. You want them to feel comfortable that you are not interested in the yummy food smells.
- Practice calm and aloofness at all times until, say, President’s Day.
Your people can find wonderful safety tips for you at ASPCA. I encourage you to check it out as well. And remember, there is a magical law honored by pet people: You can do some pretty stupid things and they will still always love you.
Your friend,
Fisher
published in tbt Tampa Bay
Out There weekend edition
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Wart: What’s going on in there?
Fisher: Planning a menu for Thanksgiving dinner.
Wart: Are we going to get samples?
Fisher: No, She is just making a plan.
Wart: Are there goodies in there?
Fisher: Probably.
Wart: Do we get samples?
Fisher: No!
We all love food and love to eat a lot, but there are some cautions we pets must take. Our friends at the ASPCA give expert advice on food safety and pets:
- watch the diet – even “safe” foods in massive quantities can upset the tummy
- Visit the Live Chat on the ASPCA community to find out about the hazards of turkey dressing!
- …and no chocolate!
What is YOUR favorite holiday treat?
Dear Fisher,
I had a most scary accident last week and my humans are still reeling from the experience. Now every time they look at me it is with worry and I can almost hear the tsk, tsk. I was racing around in the back yard and chasing a leaf because it was so much fun. I jumped up high to finally catch it and it was too close to the pool. I lost my balance and ended up slipping and hitting my head and falling in the pool. I was dazed enough that I couldn’t swim.
My boy saw this happen and laughed and then got scared because I looked like I was going to go down under. I was gasping and trying to get air with no water. It was awful. They were all so scared and now they just seem to be mad at me. How can I help them forget this terrible thing?
Curacao
Dear Curacao,
You have just disproved the great myth that cats always land on their feet! You have also exposed another truth – cats can really be clumsy at times. That is ok, I am just glad you did not drown and really destroy the lives of your people. Consider this a lesson well learned and your people will follow suit. Remember that sometimes your humans just love you so much and an upset like that can make it seem like they are mad at you, but they are not.
The biggest result of this event is most likely fear that you will pull a stunt like this again, and the best thing to do is have a plan of action. Pet first aid classes pops into my mind. Many animal shelters and the Red Cross have classes. Quick action is of utmost importance. Planning for the worst will ease the fear for both you and your people.
OK, you say, so what is the worst that could have happened? You could have gone down for count 1 and taken in a lot of water. By count 2, your breathing has gone awry, and you probably would not have even been aware of count 3. I have just described the 3 stages of drowning. No wonder your people are upset.
I strongly recommend you and your humans take a course in CPR. A good online description can be found at Rescue Critters!® brand pet CPR. Right off the bat, you need to know the first 3 rules — Look, Listen, and Feel for breathing. Rescue Breathing is used if there is a pulse, but no breathing:
- Give 4 to 5 breaths using Mouth-to-Snout method
- Check for pulse
- If there is a pulse, give 1 breath every 2 seconds for a cat
CPR (cardiopulmonary resuscitation) is used if there is no pulse and no breathing. Please visit the site, or take a class. I cannot take the risk of missing a step. Practice sessions will probably annoy you, but remember it is for your own safety.
In the meantime, I suggest getting another hobby besides leaf chasing. I recommend napping.
Your friend,
Fisher
published in tbt Tampa Bay
Out There weekend edition
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Are you a calendar cat, dog, horse, or any other kind of pet? Enter now by sending your story and a photo!
But first, we are all getting more aware of the consequences we pets may have to suffer if the economy continues in a downward spiral. One of my friends, Dr. Lucy Pinkston Schroth is working diligently on a new website to help all of us who have health issues and nowhere to turn. Dr Schroth has spent the last 28 years as a practicing small animal veterinarian and that includes 10 years in emergency and critical care. She knows “how often people cannot afford adequate emergency care for their pets.” Please visit her amazing new web site Veterinary Emergency Funding Mission to read more about this fantastic woman and her incredible mission.
Now back to the new calendar
Excerpt from her blog posted on October 27, 2008: Our first fundraising project is a calendar.
The theme is “Your Stories.” Please submit a photo of your pet, along with the story of an emergency that your pet has faced. Photos will be judged on clarity, composition, and appeal.
Stories will be judged on how well they fit in with theme of VEFM’s mission. The final choices of the winning photos and stories are made at the discretion of VEFM.
Find out how to submit how to submit your entries here. Show off a little, have some fun, and please let others know about this amazing mission.
Yesterday, while we were all listening intently to the press conference presented by President-Elect Obama, the subject of a new dog in the White House came up. We learned that Mr. President-Elect and family are looking for a hypo-allergenic dog. He also mentioned they would like to get a shelter dog but seemed unsure if they could find such a special dog at a shelter.
I have to put in a plug here for the many animal shelters around the country who are getting overloaded with cats and dogs. There is no class action the prevents the finest breeds from seeking shelter due to home foreclosures, loss of jobs for their people which leads to no dog food today, and just plain silly people who were well-meaning when they purchased the pup. So, check the shelter first.
But let’s get back to the subject of hypo-allergenic dogs. What? I never heard of such a thing. Is there such an animal? Some say: The answer is an emphatic no!…and some say probably not but here is a list of wise choices.
Check it out. What do YOU think? As for me, I am going to take a nap and dream about what it would be like for one of my fellow animals to go from a shelter to the White House! z-z-z-z-z-z
Your friend,
Fisher
